Self-obsession to self-observation to selflessness - Henri Nouwen said that once. Unreserved obedience - Thomas Kelly coined that years ago. I’ve been thinking lately that I’ve not obtained these supposed wondrous virtues in following Christ. Glimpses here and there, obedient moments to Christ scattered amongst my days gone by, and selflessness all too infrequent. Really, who is surprised by reading this. No one. Anyone who knows me well would agree, and I’d think most of you who are reading this would agree with this in your lives too. We’re all damned... Hell no!! My assurance of salvation is strong, my faith in God’s forgiveness more trusting than ever before (I think). Some of you know that my life motto is: Live It. Breathe It. I want to live a life of integrity, truth, honesty with my Friend Jesus. Not just a scattered incapacitated and inconsistent life with Jesus; an amazing every breath-filled with Jesus. Now that’s shooting for the stars! Now that’s something I can’t do on my own! If God doesn’t show up in my life, this unreserved obedience, this quest toward selflessness is in total vain. I think this would be the path of an adventurous and risk-filled faith in Christ. So if God doesn’t show up in my life, I’m hooped in the quest. Thinking further, I think I’d be ultimately screwed if God wasn’t Love Itself. Bono once translated the “Be Still and know I am God” passage (Ps.46:10) to our modern love-starved hearts… “Shut up and let me love you.” I like that. That’s a New Song. Love transforming me, urging, yearning me toward Himself.

Groaning. Broken. Heavy feelings in the chest. Fears. Sins. Forgiven?? YES! Healed?? Still a process…
Why is it that every Christian has areas in their lives where they know they are forgiven, but we can’t seem to experience complete freedom? Is not God strong enough to heal us? Isn’t this the reason why God came to this earth? To set us free, break those chains, give us freedom? Why is it that God decides to heal someone completely in one spontaneous instant, and at other times it’s a long gruelling process? Our lives are His. Our heavy hearts are His. He knows us inside-out. With this understanding of our personal God who cares for us, I want to attempt to give a brief “gut response” to the above questions.
It seems to me like we experience daily brokenness in specific areas for many reasons: To keep us reliant on God, His strength and grace; to keep us turning back to our Jealous Lord; to keep us humble before God and others; to keep us from becoming “holier than thou art” saints. Yes, we are made holy through Jesus. Yes, we are made pure through Jesus. Yes, we are many things because of Jesus!
I think of where we are all living. A broken world. Brokenness keeps us within reach of a broken and hurting world, so we can have solidarity with everyone living in it. The call for an authentic and honest Christianity is ours, before God and others.